Published on November 21, 2003 By imdayoung1 In Personal Relationships
I was raised by two very different parents. After the divorce, my mom tried her hardest to counter my dad's prejudice views. She exposed me to as many different races as she could, so that I would know and understand that we are all the same. On the other hand, every other weekend and many holidays, my dad was teaching me to dislike other races.
I knew, as I was growing up, that my mom had the right idea, and that we were all the same. And, as I was growing up, and into adult hood, I could still hear the little voice in the back of my head that was my dad. I got very good at ignoring this voice, but I can't make it go away entirely. So, a while ago, I was at a company luncheon, meeting and greeting some people in my company, which is a very diverse group, and I had a 'gut reaction' to one person. I dismissed it, as being part of my dad's training. She was african american, and though I am around many hispanics, there are not a lot of african americans in my area. I've had a reaction a lot like this before, so, I just ignored it. It didn't go away as the day went on, but I figured I was wrong. It turns out that this lady stole a lot of money from the company, was in fact, doing it when I met her, and continued to do it for a while after I had met her before she got caught. I've wondered since then, if my 'gut reaction' was me reacting to her race, as training from my father, or me reacting to her, based on what I know from the neighborhoods and poeple I was raised with when I was younger. I don't know, I'll never know if I could have saved my company money, time and lawyers, by saying something was wrong when I thought it was, rather than dismissing it. I rarely have reactions like that now, as I work out of town and there is a lot more diversity where I am now. In the future, I think I will go to the bathroom and try to sort out why I am reacting the way I am, rather than just dismissing it entirely.
Comments
on Nov 21, 2003
I would call it your "spidey senses". (Think SpiderMan if you don't know what I mean). My spidey senses tingle every now and then when I meet people. It has nothing to do with their race, it all has to do about some trait or body language that I am picking up on. I have yet to go wrong with my spidey sense about people. Just remember- just like thinking you are crazy proves that you are not, if you question something that you did as racism, it's most likely not.
on Nov 24, 2003
Thanks.